Turning in the proper direction `Jan. 14, 2013

  

In her first poem posted in more than two weeks, she seemed to confirm the sense of confusion going on behind the scenes.

The poem ought to have surprise me coming at a time she ought to appreciate landing on her feet after what might seem like a national disaster being forced to resign her job with us.

Considering the insecurity of her situation and her inability to rely on anyone to protect her, she again seems to find herself drifting, and is seeking something to set it right.

Like many of her other poems, this one appears to be a self-reflection, the speaker of the poem telling herself what options she has.

The point of the poem is to explain those options, to point out what she has relied on in the past to get through such situations.

There is a strong sense of melancholy in it, resounding with a sense of loss.

There are three stanzas.

In the first, she is saying that turning herself in the right direction may be the first step. She uses words like “proper thing” a rather formal way of putting what might be expected of her, doing her duty perhaps as the world around her crashes. Perhaps even implying loyalty to someone or something.

In the second stanza, she describes herself in the midst of conflict, a struggle that has her grasping to hold on, as she pulls herself against the hostility.

She then uses another formal term “Predilection,” in a past tense, as if it is something she has relied upon in the past when all else has failed.

The word “Predilection” is in one sense, a tendency stronger than “like” but not quite potent as “love.” It connotes a sense of bias or prejudice and implies a leaning towards things she trusts or is predisposed towards, depending on what she believes already has served her as a crutch during those times when all else is in doubt.

The third stanza is something of a reversal, hinting of despair, a cry for help, a call for affection she so desperately needs.

The third stanza is more complicated in that she mentions “a cry” as if in a cry for help, “a call into the night, as if seeking someone without knowing who might answer, when she desperately needs affection to feed her.

It is not clear if she got the affection in answer to her cry and why she remains where she is or is still waiting for it.

It might suggest that she still believes in the cause she has taken up “the proper thing,” and she gets what she needs.

There is a feeling that her fate may be tied to something else, and if that something else fails (the mayor or RR) then she might not have anything else to hold onto.

The poem makes use of a brilliant pattern of rhymes, end rhymes that enhance the drum beat like message she is making, and a series of internal rhymes that pull the body of the work together.

The end rhymes through the three stanzas are do/you, knew/you, grew/you.

Direction/Predilection/affection and right/fight/ night make up some of the internal rhymes as each of these words appears in the same place in each of the stanzas.

She goes on to use parallel phrasing in each of the stanzas as well: “the proper thing’, “the only thing, “and then in a variation, “the only way.”

She also reinforces one of her internal rhyme schemes in a repeated phrase “Direction seems,” “Predilection seems.” And “affection seems.”

The end lines in the first two stanzas echo each other in a sense of distance and loss “fast from you,” and “far from you,” and in a more hopeful end of the third stanza, she reminds herself of her need for affection.

The poem appears to be telling her to hold fast, that she must do the right and proper thing, but must rely on her own wits and experience, and ultimately what she needs to survive is someone’s love or gratitude.

She is clearly adrift as the poem suggest, grasping to hold on to someone or something, and needs to remind herself of what has helped her in the past and on what she can rely, and the thing she needs most. If not love them something close to it, something that can feed or her soul.

The poem seems to say that she believes she had turned in a direction she considers right, and she is doing what she needs to do to survive “pull against the fight,” and yet, still needs something to give her hope and strength.

 

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